Thursday, March 6, 2008

Have a few hours?

I've said it time and time again... but one of the greatest things about college sports is it's ability to make you hate a kid for making a decision when he was 18 years. That idiot who went to the cow college across the state will feel your wrath for the rest of his years as you dominate their team year in and year out (except for the years that the refs screw you.)

For years and year our hatred was held to games and random sightings at Wal-Mart where you threw feminine products and Gay magazines into the cart of a total stranger based on the t-shirt and cap they chose for the day.

But gone are the days of face-to-face smack. The internet has brought the ability of anonymous smack talk to the masses.

And Thank God for it. Without the internet we wouldn't have a fan site called

Without the interwebs we wouldn't have the following list of awesomeness in form of smack talk.

Big East
Big Televen
Pac 10

Some of the more intelligible comments (NSFW at all. Like really. Or appropriate):

- I was 8 years old going to a Maryland game in College Park. Maryland fans threw flaming toilet paper rolls at me and yelled in my face and threw beer bottles at us. They would steal our car flags off our car while we were driving. They burn down their school if they win or lose the final four. I don’t know about Crab Cakes and Football in Maryland, more like Crab Cakes and As@ Holes! The ACC should of never let them yanks join.

-You are so right. It must be those stupid Clemson fans voting that has put SCAR number 1. It couldn’t possibly be that South Carolina fans are ACTUALLY delusional, obnoxious, overbearing, drunk, and for the most part white trash that stumble out of their trailer parks on Saturday’s in the fall and head to ol’ Billy Brice, only to leave in the 3rd quarter when the liquor starts wearing off and the chickens are down by 3 touchdowns. This has to be a conspiracy by Clemson University- probably part of the same conspiracy that has kept USC a losing program for over 100 years!!!

- I have nothing to do with my boring life in Nebraska. I worship a bunch of young men in tight pants that play for my favorite team. Lawrence Phillips beat my sister, but I was cool with that because he is a God to me. Then Christian Peter beat my tranny-girlfriend after he nailed her, but that is even cooler since he is a white guy that plays football for my Huskers and I can’t satisfy my tranny.

- Tceh is made up of country kids that couldn’t get into Texas A&M or Texas. This makes them extremely bitter and they think they can gain rapport with Texas by hating on Texas A&M. Tceh is inferior not only to the flagships in academics, but also lags behind schools such as UH, Texas State, UTEP, UNT, Tarleton State, SFA, Baylor, TCU, St. Edwards, and even Concorida. There are at least 3 dozen schools in Texas with better academics than Texas Tech. I’ve never met a single person ever rejected from tceh.

- I would like to invite all mountaineer fans to attend my couch burning class being offered next Saturday at the brokeback bar & grill. We will cover such topics as using proper accelerants, not catching yourself on fire, denying to the police that it is your couch that is on fire even when it is on your porch, and other hot couch burning topics. I do ask that everyone attending keep to the subject matter at hand and not try to bring in unrelated subject matter....

Rich Rod posters will be available for you to threaten as well.

- UCF has been known to stab fans, cheerleaders, football players, and coaches of other teams. You need a bullet proof vest just to get in the student section. UCF also doesn’t allow anybody to drink from their water fountains. I heard for the halftime show they just put on a dogfight and the fans bet on which dog is going to win.

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