Saturday, May 31, 2008

Injury report.

$&^#&(^# the &^(&%(&*% sorry *&)*&^ toe!!!

Out for the season w/ that son of a gun.

Thursday, May 29, 2008

Hecka Busy

We've been hecka busy lately.

Some involves memorial day.

Some involves some changes at work.

The rest involves a flat tire followed by a four hour trip in a rental car with nothing on the radio but tejano and Jim Rome. Both of which I hate. A staticky Rush Limbaugh came in and that filled the void. Yes... I chose a staticky Rush over sports talk. That's how much I hate Jim Rome.


3 months from today
Matt Stafford will keg lift your team

Friday, May 23, 2008


CFN continues giving in the offseason. Here's some more of their previews

Florida Gators

Mizzou Tigahs

Wisconsin Badgers

Thursday, May 22, 2008

Oh yeah... by the way....

Less than 100 days until football starts!!!


Ha ha... but your salary, I has it in Seattle

News like this just brings a bit of joy to a guy like me.

Ty Willingham made more money from Notre Dame in direct pay in '05-'06 and '06-'07 than Charlie Weis.

As just a general disliker of Notre Dame, you like to hear things like that. Kinda restores your faith in mankind.

Reminds you that God is smiling down on us. And He's merciful.

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Players We're Friggin' Excited About

Jeremy Maclin, Mizzou

The Clip isn't all him(look for #9), but he makes his fair share of highlights. The freshmen lit up defenses and special teams last year with some blazing speed and shifty moves. Expect Daniel and J-Mac to keep the magic going in Columbia.

Thursday, May 15, 2008

Godspeed, Joe.

JoePa goes to the hospital.

Here's to a speedy recovery good sir.

Well That Was Quick

While I'm sure there will be a couple of days/weeks before we hear the final verdict on the whole WVU/RichRod scandal one little quip in the court document seals the deal.

The Charleston Daily has the court documents here.

It takes a few pages down on the first part to find the end of the trial, but I'll highlight it for you

RichRod is asked to read his 2002 contract.

The Integration Clause
Page 13
Roman Numeral 10.

The Entire Agreement

It is mutually understood that this agreement contains all the terms and conditions to which the parties have agreed and there are no other understandings or representations, either oral or written, unless referenced in the preceding paragraphs. Regarding the subject matter this agreement shall be deemed to exist as a bond to the parties hereto. Any modification, amendment or addendum to this agreement shall be effective only if made in writing and signed by both parties

Gun. Meet Foot.

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

ESPN is Feeling Spunky Early This Year

ESPN's early rankings by Mark Schlabach

For what it's worth... having a predatory feline as mascot seems to be profitable this year.

4 tigers
1 panther
1 cougar
1 lion

1. OSU Buckeyes
Can't truly fault people here. Tressel's too good to not be ranked as a top 10 team. ESPN is just embracing the inevitable here. See USC below.

2. Georgia Bulldogs
Most are picking them as the sexy number one to start the year. FWIW they're going to be good. And they ain't going to be undefeated.

3. Oklahoma Sooners
It's early. The Sooners have to be ranked high. Late October - Mid November is when Stoops Swan Song dips the Sooners into bolivian

4. USC Trojans
Pete Carroll is stoked folks. Stoked I say. Whoever wins between OSU and USC will either take the #1 spot or #2 behind Georgia.

5. Florida Gators
Florida is an early sexy pick for the MNC. Unless that secondary and running games are nights and day different... I don't see it. Tebow is still Jeebus in cleats for the mean while

6. Mizzou Tigers
What a tough break last year. Beat two BCS teams lose to one (albeit twice) and you get gyped. Still one of the best seasons in school history. Moneymakers Macklin and Daniel are back with a what should still be a solid defense.

7. Clemson Tigers
This is supposed to be Clemson's year to go big.... you know... again. Cullen Harper is a good QB and has come a long way since Charlie left. He's honestly one of the better QB's you probably haven't heard much about

8. Texas Longhorns
The Horns manage to be a perenial top 10 team but have only gotten over the hump of being second in the Big XII once in Mac's tenure. And that was solely based on the freak of nature cheetah/gazelle/emu freak codenamed Vince Young.

9. West Virginia Mountaineers
Slaton and RichRod are gone. But White's still here and some midget named devine who will run circles around you like the pygmies did the Rock in the Rundown. Should still be the class of the East.

10. Auburn Tigers
TT lost a DC and a lot of fire in the offseason but bring in a fancy spread thingy. I think this ranking is based more on reputation than the actual team. Sorry.

11. Texas Tech Red Raiders
18 returning starters and some kid name Crabtree is just sexy. No ifs ands or buts about it. If the defense improves as much as Raiders like to think OU and Texas need to look out.

12. LSU Tigers
Ranking last years winner below 10 is an injury. Ranking them below three teams they beat last year is insult to injury. These tigers are still a top 10 team.

13. ASU Sun Devils
Was the Sun Devils' success based on a down Pac-10 or an improved team. Cal and Oregon imploded late in the season and the Sun Devils were there to reap the benefits. There were no huge stars, but the offense and defense did just enough to merit a 10-3 season. This year will be a more telling year.

14. BYU Cougers
One of the funniest things is the outcry for a team like BYU at the end of the year who may or may not end up undefeated. "They started out ranked so low.... Personally don't do rankings if that's your cry.

wait.... what???

Seriously, the Mormons should be pretty good. They just need to get by the # 0 Huskies and UCLA in consecutive weeks and their golden, Jerry. Gold

15. Tennessee Volunteers
The Vols turned in a better year than anticipated. The loss to Cali and Florida at the first of the season looked ugly but, they rapidly put those behind and won the SEC East and their bowl game. A lot of talent is back and except for that pesky 2005 season, the Vols usually ain't bad.

16. Illinois Fighting Redactors
With Juice Williams still at QB this is a question mark. He can play like an absolute woman one game and then rip off first down after first down straight down the middle the next(OSU. Hint. Hint.)

17. Kansas City Jayhawks
The fighting Manginos did it. They proved they deserved to be in the BCS. However, gone is the stars of the show from last season. The Jayhawks should still be ranked in my book, but we'll see very quickly if they deserve it.

18. Wisconsin Badgers
Everidge and Hill in the backfield = sexy. If Michigan isn't back on top, look for the Badgers to challenge for the Midwest.

19. Pittsburgh Panthers
Again.... I'm calling it here. Pitt don't end the year ranked in the top 20. If I'm wrong you can expect something horribly embarrassing on my end. Like me singing some horrible song or painting

20. Virginia Tech Hokies
The Hokies won't ever be unranked. Just write it down for a while.

21. Fresno State Bulldogs
Probably my favorite mid-major. They're not always ranked, but they're not ever bad. They beat KState and GaTech to finish off a good year.

22. Wake Forest Demon Deacons
Grobe has these guys competitive. Clemson's supposed to be the class of the ACC, but a naked Riley Skinner says otherwise baby!

23. Oregon Ducks
Tough end losing Dixon last year, but the Ducks will rebound and J Johnson should continue racking up the yards

24. Michigan State Spartans
Starting them off ranked is just confusing. Even with Ringer. Top on my teams-not-to-rank- in the preseason poll: Texas A&M, Florida State, Miami, Iowa, and Michigan State. There you go.

25. Penn State Nittany Lions
JoePa. I don't need to add or subtract. Kinda like Revelation.

Screw You and Your #1 Ranking

The Huskies will gladly take #0. Because in this game, the lower the better.

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

CFN is Gracious and Giving

and has began their annual preseason preview of 119 teams.

We're starting the third leg of the race here folks. The worst is ahead of us.

Here's the links followed w/ a small excerpt:

Auburn Tigers

What to watch for on offense: The quarterback battle. Who's going to run the new attack? Kodi Burns, the hero of the bowl win over Clemson, finished spring ball on a high note and is an emerging passer, but the consistency won't be there for a full season; he needs a year before he reaches his potential. Texas Tech transfer Chris Todd would be the ideal option to start funnin' and gunnin', but he had a banged up shoulder this off-season and will have to fight for the job. There's a chance for a rotation unless one takes the job by the horns late this summer.

What to watch for on defense: The secondary will be dominant ... again. It's a no-name bunch that was fantastic despite the lack of a steady and consistent pass rush, and now it could be even more productive with CB Jerraud Powers blossoming into a star and the rising sophomore safety tandem of Mike McNeil and Zac Etheridge among the best in the SEC.

The team will be far better if … it gets into the backfield on a regular basis. Considering the ends were Quentin Groves, Sen'Derrick Marks and Antonio Coleman, you'd think the Tiger pass rush would've been lethal, but Groves got hurt early and was never right and Coleman didn't get much help from anyone else. It's hard to argue with the overall results of last year's defense, allowing fewer than 300 yards and 17 points per game, but the back seven could be even more effective if the opposing quarterbacks felt more heat.

The Schedule: There will be plenty of big-time games, but almost all of them are at home. Going on the road to face West Virginia in a mid-season Thursday night game is the only away date problem until the season-ender at Alabama. LSU, Tennessee and Georgia are all good enough to win the SEC title, but they're all coming to Jordan-Hare. It'll be vital to not be tripped up at Ole Miss or at Mississippi State; the Tigers must take advantage of the relative scheduling break. Yeah, AU deserves credit for going to Morgantown to face the Mountaineers, but it makes up for it with games against UL Monroe and UT Martin.

LSU Tigers

What to watch for on offense: The quarterbacks. Everything else is in place from the veteran offensive line to the NFL talents at receiver to the four-headed monster in the backfield. The quarterbacks don't have to play like JaMarcus Russell or even Matt Flynn; they just have to keep things moving, make a big third down throw here and there, and get out of the way. Jarrett Lee and Andrew Hatch will keep the battle going throughout the summer.

What to watch for on defense: The line to be every bit the killer it was last year, if not more so. Losing Glenn Dorsey hurts no matter what, but Charles Alexander, Ricky Jean-Francois, Marlon Favorite and Al Woods will keep the production going. If Tyson Jackson plays like the top ten pick he's supposed to be, no one's doing anything against this front four.

The team will be far better if … the penalties slow down. For the second year in a row, LSU struggled mightily when it came to the sins. After committing 83 in 2006, the Tigers were 117th in the nation (only South Florida and Cincinnati committed more) averaging 8.36 per game committing 117 on the year.

The Schedule: Opening up with lamb-for-the-slaughter games against Appalachian State (stop it ... this won't be Michigan Part 2), Troy and North Texas will give the team time to jell before going to Auburn for what could be the battle for the SEC West. The defending national champions don't get much of a break from the SEC scheduling gods facing road games at Florida and South Carolina before hosting Georgia in Death Valley. Get through those three, and the end of October, with just one loss, and the national title could be there for the taking with a manageable November facing Tulane, Alabama, Ole Miss and a road trip to Arkansas.

Miami Hurricanes
What to watch for on offense: The last time Miami started a freshman under center, Bernie Kosar was a teenager on campus in the 1980s. It’ll happen again this year, as Robert Marve tries to reverse a recent trend of inconsistency at quarterback and a last place ACC finish in passing. He’ll be surrounded by 10 players with something to prove, particularly RB Javarris James and WR Sam Shields. James is looking to bounce back from an injury-riddled sophomore season and a drop in production. Shields has a world-class blend of speed, burst, and leaping ability, but needs to put it all together to finally reach his enormous potential.

What to watch for on defense: The Cane defense will be looking to rebound from a November collapse that saw it sink to an un-Miami-like 10th place ACC finish in scoring D. While LB Colin McCarthy and DE Eric Moncur will be the catalysts, new coordinator Bill Young will also be weaving in a handful of younger players, including blue-chip true freshmen Marcus Forston, Arthur Brown, and Sean Spence. Keep an eye on sophomore DE Allen Bailey, a converted linebacker who has torn it up in the offseason and possesses a ridiculous combination of size, speed, and strength.

The team will be far better if… Marve doesn’t play like a freshman. Heck, this is Quarterback U., and it’s about time Miami starts playing like it. The defense will be better and the running game is in good hands, but the Canes can’t afford another season averaging just 169 yards a game through the air. The burden falls on the rookie quarterback and a group of receivers that’s been better in shorts than in pads.

The Schedule
: The Canes will know just how much better they've gotten this off-season in a big hurry. After a warm-up against Charleston Southern, road dates at Florida and Texas A&M could either set the tone for the season or show just how far the program still has to go. On the flip side, the big Coastal showdown against Virginia Tech is at home, missing Clemson and Boston College from the Atlantic, and getting Florida State in Miami are all tremendous breaks. Closing up with three road dates (Virginia, Georgia Tech and NC State) in the final four, with the home game against the Hokies, isn't a plus.

West Virginia Mountaineers

What to watch for on offense: Even after rushing for 1,335 yards, passing for 1,724 yards, and accounting for 28 touchdowns, the Mountaineers might need more from QB Patrick White this season. Without playmakers Steve Slaton, Owen Schmitt, and Darius Reynaud, who caught 12 touchdown passes, West Virginia is searching for reliable complements to its dynamic quarterback. The most likely candidate to step up is RB Noel Devine, who erupted for 627 yards and six touchdowns on only 73 carries as a rookie. The offensive line, always a constant in Morgantown, returns five starters and will be among the best units in the country.

What to watch for on defense: Coordinator Jeff Casteel was retained, good news considering how well the Mountaineers performed in 2007. The defense was air-tight in all facets, allowing just 300 yards and 18 points a game, while finishing ninth nationally in turnover margin. Maintaining that level of play, however, is about to get tougher. Even without Marc Magro, the linebackers will be fine, but the defensive line must be rebuilt, and there’s a depth issue in the secondary. While Casteel will continue to lean on undersized athletes that fly to the ball, he’s going to need help from a few newcomers and redshirt freshmen.

The team will be far better if
… Devine is able to handle the load as an every down back. Although Steve Slaton will certainly be missed, his production really tailed off last season, and injuries always seemed to be an issue. West Virginia believes it might do better with Devine taking carries, provided he can withstand the punishment that comes with 20 or 25 carries a game. A game-changer when he gets in space, he’s also only 5-8 and 170 pounds, a big concern if he becomes the go-to guy out of the backfield.

The Schedule: The schedule looks harder than it actually should be. The Big East slate isn't bad early and gets tough late with road trips to Louisville and Pitt in the span of six days, but remember, those two didn't go to a bowl last year. South Florida comes to Morgantown on December 6th; a perfect time to catch the warm-weather team. After a warm-up against Villanova to kick things off, the non-conference schedule gets nasty the rest of the way with trips to East Carolina and Colorado along with the mid-season showdown against Auburn. Win those three and a national title shot will likely be there for the taking.

Friday, May 9, 2008

More Bowl Thoughts

I'm by no means a mathematician. In fact I suck horribly at math. The last math class I took was called "Math 1343: Math for Liberal Fine Arts Majors." You laugh but I kid you not. The first lesson we learned was that in a normal election... whoever gets the most votes, wins. But you can also do a point/ranking system. Then electoral college... etc.

The last lesson was balancing a check book.
I wish I was joking with you or something but I'm not. Dr. Dimminie ruled. All that to say I'm not qualified to put out the stats I'm about to put out.

But back to the addition of the bowls thing
I thought about it some more and let's say that we have 120 teams who only play amongst themselves (I'm dropping the 1-AA games just for math's sake, It shouldn't make a difference)


120 teams
12 games apiece

720 games played (120*12= 1440, 1440/2=720 ***divide by two because each game is shared between two teams)

That means you have an even amount of losses and wins distributed amongst the 120 teams. 720 wins and 720 losses to divide out.

It takes 6 wins to make it to a bowl and there are 34 bowls (68 teams)

68x6=408 wins needed to fill the bowl allotment.

So, every year 408 wins (out of 720 total) need to be shared by 68 teams to meet the bowl fulfillments. That means that it takes 56% of the total number of wins possible to be spread amongst the 68 teams.

Since we have to win 50% (and lose 50%) of our games the differential is 6%. Throwing out the concept of 120 6-6 teams, 6% of the total wins have to be shared amongst your top teams.

That's not hard to do really.

Last year, how many 6-win(or better) teams were left out of the bowl picture?

Six, that I could find.

USCe 6-6
Iowa 6-6
Troy Trojans (8-4... ouch didn't even notice this during the season)
Northwestern 6-6
Louisiana-Monroe 6-6
Miami OH 6-7

So it's not like there's a ton of teams that are there to slip in... but you figure that we just added four more teams out of that group right there with two bowls.

I'm far too lazy to look up the left out teams from two years ago but I don't imagine more than 6-7 teams were given the cold shoulder.

So right now it looks like it'll be OK. We add one more bowl or that bad year nobody wants comes and we just may get to see what happens when we don't have enough bowl spots for teams.

Interesting enough I guess.

Ummm... how many days till kick off now? 114? K thanks.

Thursday, May 8, 2008

Fuzzy Math

So this week the NCAA allowed for two new bowls.

The St. Petersburg Bowl and the Congressional Bowl have been added to bring it to a whopping 34 bowls

68 teams out of 120 (Go Western Kentucky Hilltoppers)

Yes... that is over50% of your teams that will be playing in a bowl this year.

Now say that you take away 1-AA victories as wins that count towards bowl eligibility.

It would be mathematically impossible with the 6 win minimum for a bowl for all the teams necessary to fill all the bowl slots as you have to have as many losses shelved out as wins.

Awesome. It's like getting the snow cone after the baseball game even though your team was run-ruled in the second inning.

Not that that happened to me ever. I ruled and took the losers' snow cones and wimmuns.

We're Back Baby

After a hellacious three weeks of work, we are finally back and stoked for college football.

114 days and shrinking baby!!!! or 16 weeks.....

Tuesday, May 6, 2008


all day today and tomorrow.

We're out.

Orson's got the leader board and some interesting additions for the Fulmer Cup over at

Monday, May 5, 2008

People Who Get Paid to do This Stuff..

over at have compiled a most excellent list of the spring game breakdowns:

Big East
Big 12
Pac 10

A few of the more prominent ones that we care about:

In the team’s final scrimmage of the spring season, the defense more than held its own against quarterback Sam Bradford and company, scoring three times on three ‘pick sixes’. Soon-to-be starting cornerback Dominique Franks kicked off the pick six parade with a 57-yarder off of Bradford and then added two other interceptions on the day. The secondary has the most holes to fill on this squad; considering the fact Franks and fellow corner Jonathan Nelson (an 81-yard interception for a touchdown) had strong days spoke volumes as to why head coach Bob Stoops felt so good about his back four.


The buzz in Columbia is as loud as it’s ever been and it was evident for the spring game – televised on ESPNU with over 26,000 in attendance. What they saw was nearly the same thing they saw at the end of the 2007 season and a 71-28 win for the offense. Heisman candidate Chase Daniel was his usual prolific self, completing 22 of 28 passes for 195 yards and two touchdowns. And, in another non-surprise, wide receiver Jemery Maclin had six receptions for 52 yards and a touchdown. However, the defense took some hits this spring, in particular linebacker Van Alexander who went down with a torn knee ligament.

West Virginia
When the proverbial lights went on in Morgantown, the star-studded offense turned it up a couple of notches, piling up 336 yards of total offense in the team’s annual Blue-Gold spring game. Heisman candidate Pat White completed 12 of 16 passes for 133 yards, while quicksilver running back Noel Devine averaged nearly seven yards per carry on his six carries. The defensive star of the day was Najee Goode who led the defense with ten tackles.

The annual Trojan Huddle end-of-spring intrasquad game went to overtime, a fantastic finish to a competitive spring. The White emerged victorious 39-36 over the Cardinal squad after receiver Travon Patterson caught a 25-yard touchdown pass from quarterback Aaron Corp. Most of the eyes in the house were on the three quarterbacks battling for the starting position. Mark Sanchez was stellar, completing 16 of 24 passes for 203 yards and three touchdowns, while Arkansas transfer Mitch Mustain completed six of ten for 111 yards and two touchdowns. Corp might have had the best day of all, completing 13 of 16 passes for 158 yards and two touchdowns, including the game-winner.

Ohio State
Over 76,000 people packed the ‘Shoe to watch the Scarlet beat the Gray 20-7 in the annual spring game. All-Big Ten candidate Brian Hartline was the offensive star for the Scarlet team, catching six passes for 82 yards, half of quarterback Todd Boeckman’s 12 completions. A 48-yard toss from Boeckman to Hartline put the Scarlet offense in the position for the first touchdown of the day. Dan Herron hit paydirt on a three-yard touchdown run to seal the deal for the Scarlet team on the rain filled day in Columbus.

With most of the starters playing for the Cardinal team, the outcome of the annual Cardinal and White game was predictable – a Cardinal 28-3 win. Quarterback Allan Evridge finally has a starting job and finished the game seven of 12 for 137 yards, but with one interception. Running back Lance Smith ran for just under 100 yards, but split time with both Cardinal and White throughout the game. Head coach Bret Bielema was happy with a thin defensive unit that only gave up two touchdowns on the day.

All-ACC candidate Cullen Harper led Orange squad to a 16-7 victory over the White in the annual Clemson Spring Game. Harper completed 13 of 18 passes for 142 yards and two touchdowns. While running back James Davis and receiver Jacoby Ford sat out the scrimmage, star receiver Aaron Kelly had a solid outing catching eight passes for 108 yards and a touchdown.

Virginia Tech
One year after the tragic events of the spring of 2007, the Hokies took the field in the annual Maroon and White spring contest, as the starting quarterback tete-a-tete continued. Quarterback Sean Glennon led the Maroon squad to a 24-3 win, hooking up with receiver Brandon Dillard for a 25 yard score in the first half. Dillard also had a 49 yard run on a reverse to set up the Maroon team’s first touchdown. Rising sophomore quarterback Tyrod Taylor struggled throughout the day for the White, throwing one interception and getting sacked three times.

The annual G-Day game had some unexpected rain showers, but the rain held off long enough for the Red to beat the Black 17-3. Quarterback Matt Stafford kicked off the scoring, completing a 30-yard pass to receiver Michael Moore for the Red team that had the first team offense and the second team defense. The Black offense was led by running back Caleb King who ran for 31 yards on only six carries. UGA fans have waited an entire season to see King, who was one of the top recruits in the class of 2006.

Although Tim Tebow got Erin Andrews attention, it was the jitterbug from Lakeland who had everyone else’s. Running back Chris Rainey made his presence known in front of a national television audience and helped lead the Blue to a 28-14 win over the Orange in the annual Orange and Blue Debut. He accounted for 76 yards rushing and one touchdown through the air, in which he embarrassed the Orange secondary with his jock-dropping quickness. Tebow, albeit on a day he was sick as could be, completed 13 of 21 for 200 yards and two touchdowns.

Suck It, Bobby!!!


The En-See-Aye-Aye has said heck no
to Arkansas' Bobby Petrino's request to allow Ryan Mallet to skip that whole pesky sit-out-a-year-for-transferring rule.

Anything you've heard about the weeping and lamenting in Fayetville may or may not be true.

Friday, May 2, 2008

Friday's Friggin' Awesome Film

As long as I've loved sports I've loved Nike. Is their product always the best? Probably not. But does anybody else put out cooler ads?

I submit to you, no.

It Was Fun While it Lasted.

The day has finally come.

As hard as it is for us all to accept it, the greatness that is Ryan Perrilloux is finally off of the LSU Tigers team.

You can't even ask why. Maybe you could ask "why now?"

I'm sure he'll make some more headlines in the near future... just not for the Bayou Bengals.

Thursday, May 1, 2008


We couldn't get a good clip of it... but this is a recent interview w/ Bob Costas, Braylon Edwards, Buzz Bissinger, and Will Liech (of Deadspin). I'll go as far as to say that each of these men are some of the greatest in each of their respective fields. The discussion gets real heated real quick. Bissinger goes off on a tangent on Will and blogs in general.

I agree to an extent. There is a lot of anonymity in blogging. We can say a lot of things behind the cloak of TCP/IP. But we get to do it for fun. We're not trying to make money here. Outside of Perez Hilton, Orson, Liech, and a few others, we'll never make money at this. We do it because we love it. We're trying not to practice real journalism. We want to make jokes about Jim Delaney cussing out Jim Swofford. We want to do a montage of Tommy T. taking out guys knees.

We know we're not the professionals. We know that we're the bunch of 30 year olds playing flag football with bad looking spin moves and cuts. We act way more ridiculous when we score than an NFL player. We know that. You guys are the NFL players.

We get it.

Going on a tirade against the lead blogger doesn't prove your point. It just makes you sound like a profane, angry professional. But still a "professional."

Fight on Ben

Mauk was denied his appeal for a 6th year of eligibility.

But yet again fighting against the man.... Mauk will seek to go to the next level up to appeal.

Stick it to the man, Ben. Stick it to 'em